The Only benefit of Kevin Rudds RTD Policy.

You know thoses mornings when you just cannot for the life of you stop pressing snooze or saying to yourself '5 more minutes'? Well for me this morning was one of those and now I'm missing college, I'm only allowed 5 absences this term so thats 2 down already, so to counter balance my non-productive day I'm having a rant as such.

Ekka is just around the corner, busiest time of year for the pub I work in, this will be my 3rd! It's hard to beleive I've been here so long, I dont think I've spent more than 6 months at home since 2005, I haven't seen my sister for more than 4 hours since June 6th 2006 god I miss home and everyone. The Ekka or Royal Brisbane Exhibition as it is named in English, fucking Ekka, I'm as pedantic as my good friend Dave B when it comes to lazy talk and the good old Aussies have it nailed so well I dont seem to be offended anymore and that worries me, any Veg, the Ekka is much like the Great Yorkshire Show and the Stray Fair all rolled into one but imagine no Chavs and introduce Aussie Cowboys........Craziest bunch of people I've met in my life, as with all groups of society you get your good ones and your bad ones but there is a tried and tested method to tell who's going on your cut off list or being frogmarched outside by security, Those that drink Beer and those that drink Rum.

Your typical beer drinker will be jolly and fine most of the night with the occasional rant into the meaning of life and why the government are screwing everyone over, complain about the flies and the how dry the year has been and they will get slightly rowdy but not uncontrollably and maybe sing a song too.

Your typical rum drinkers however will do all of the above, leer at the barstaff complain about everything and then start fighting and ruin everyones night by just being rude, arrogant, disgusting arseholes.

I never thought I'd say this but the mistake Kevin Rudd made putting the tax on premixed RTD's (Ready To Drink, JD&Coke and stuff) up so high a Bundy rum and cola costs $9 instead of $5 is actually going to benefit all Ekka goers an staff that come in over the next 14 days as beer is still $5.50 a schooner or bottle so there will be less arseholes about the place, I hope.

I still think the whole tax on RTD's is bloody ridiulous, they've been finding kids just mixing a litre of Jack with a 1.25litre coke or just trying to get drugs instead because they are cheaper, its alo endangered bottleshop workers as we are being targetted for theft as the drinks are too expensive, our place has had shoplifters 5 times over the last 2 months from a good all round 3 a year.

Another round of applause for Kev.

I'm over babbling now! peace out brothas and sistas.

Oh and anyone who wants to donate $5000 so I can come home it would be muchly appreciated ;) or just click a few ads, I'll get there by 2010 I reckon.

Yay.

Why do Businessmen buy bars, attempt to run them and wonder where they fail?

Hi peoples.

It's been a while I know and I promised to update often I know, But I've had a strange and slightly stressful few months recently a laptop that got rained on and caught fire and a new Emily The Strange Epiphone SG guitar and 100w Kustom Amp to get to grips with.

I finished my first year of college in May so once I get my references and go to the Trade Recognition people I'm shall be a qualified Chef in the eyes of the Orstrayan government which is good, another year to go though on the business management and hospitality operations bullshit I've already done before in various places and I'll be able to aply stay here permanantly and open a decent bar hopefully, I wish that day was sooner rather than later though as I'm over the place I work in now.

The lovely new owners that took over the bar I work in are abunch of amateurs on the hospitality side of things. It's not just me that thinks so too, at least 90% of the staff and customers that know them agree. They have gave my manager and friend, Jeremy, notice that he would not be needed after the Brisbane Exhibition, which is a Great Yorkshire show type thing to those at home, AFTER he did all the planning for what is essentially the busiest 2 weeks in the Pubs life and after he nearly ending up in hospital for the bastards because of fumes from the workmen when they stained a room without ventilation and this is how they repay a hard working guy!

Jez has run the place on an evening since our old manageress left in november/dec they have just now got their heads out of their arses and actually started to care about the place and give us staff and equipment to work with although it has taken a complaint to Environmental health about the cold dish and glasswashers and the danger some of the building areas posed to people.

This is the icing on the cake though as far as their morally wrong and stupid idiotic work methods have been put in place. they have built 3 bars that are the shittest to work in EVER, they are either too high, wrongly built for service or have bad workmanship as taps dont work and tiles and stuff are coming off. They have taken staff discounts, bonuses, knock off drinks and incentives away but put prices up 4 times in 6 months 'Because of interest rates' and have also started to kill off the live music gigs, I've seen the GP and sales reports and its good too see them down since they destroyed the pub with their inept ability to treat people as humans and the ripping off the customers we used to have.

Anyone who wants to run a bar needs to treat staff well or they will rip you off left right and centre and not care about anything that happens to the place, its good having all these systems and easy ways to do paperwork but its no good knowing what to do back of house if you cant even fathom the actual face of the business itself.

Another warning I would like any would be bar owners or businessmen looking to open a venue, learn something about it first, whether that means jumping behind a bar for 6 months to get the feel or reading ALOT about it. Stop spoiling the fast dying art of Hospitality and Bartending with your greed and stupid ideas and start giving something back to the patrons and staff, you will make more money and your venue will also get a good reputation, higher prices do not mean more money, it means people spend less and seek cheaper watering holes.

Now lets move on, I'm getting annoyed! I met a guy I used to go to school with here whilst waiting for a taxi at 4am on fri or sat, crazy shit. I was soo drunk but it was good to see and hear homely peoples! More people shall be coming soon too, The lovely Janine will hopefully be catching up with me when shes in Brisbane and also I hear a rumour a Mr Matt whom I used to work at Gamestation will be here soon too for a week or so so hopefully they will alleviate some of my homesickness alongside the Mighty Boosh and the shop that sells twiglets and cherry coke....I'm the moooon!

On another note I'm quite happily healthy at the moment, although the social smoking is getting out of hand in the last few weeks (sorry mum). I lost between 20-25kg from christmas to May by cutting out beer Mon, Tues, Thurs and occasionally Sun, walking lots, eating more homecooked stuff now I'm chef boy and volunteering to do the harder jobs at work (they can get fucked now tho).

And thats that, lots missed out and a funny story saved for next time but I'll make up for it and this time I'll update at least monthly.

Love and miss all my friends and family! COME SEE ME!

Lee

PS. If you want to check out a cool bar in Brisbane check out the Lychee Lounge in West End. Just like I want my first place to be and it has a Yorkshire bartender, it rocks!

Honestly, somehow it always seems that I'm dreamin' of something that I can never be.

WHAT AN AWESOME NIGHT!!!!

I'm still buzzing a little here from seeing Korn at the Brisbane Riverstage stage after all these years and man did they put on a good show. They even incorporated a little of queens "We will rock you" into a verse of a song I now cant remember because of the awesomeness and the fact I regressed to the mental state of a 15 year old once again.

Mr Jonathan Davis was a bit more talkative than usual and was smiling like in insanely happy person which was cool although I wonder what the oxygen mask was actually needed for!?!?! Munkeh was being as rocking as ever and Fieldy has got to be one of the best alternative or just one of the greatest bass players ever. I loved every minute of it. They performed in no order Faget (dedicated to the old school fans)moved onto some Freak on a Leash, A.D.I.D.A.S and then did a couple from the new album.

The support line up was pretty good, Throwdown had the unfortunate first slot when the place was no where near full but they played a great set and got most of the lazy bastards on their feet.

Next up were an old favourite of mine Chimaira! THESE GUYS KICKED ASS!! They played it loud and proud and had the whole place kicking off in a circle mosh! Before the main act we then had another old great in the form of Biohazard, still putting on a good show after 20 years (anniversary gig apparently) albeit after a slow start they also rocked up the joint but I couldn't help feeling something was missing from their act, maybe it was the beer wearing off :)

All in all an awesome gig! Just a shame they didn't take Cards for the Apparel, I'm sure they lost out on a few thousand $$$$ due to that and also pissed off a few people, especially Lindsay who has been to quite a few of Korns appearances here and has yet to be able to buy a T-shirt, If its not size or lack of Ladies tops (she is over 6ft) its the bloody card machines absence.

Keep up the good work guys, and get an eftpos machine (for cards, real $$$ are for beer).

Over and out

Lee

Aren't arachnids wonderful?

I took this photo a few weeks ago, its on my facebook but I thought I'd share it with the rest of you.

This is a Golden Orb Weaver and his little buddy, He made a web over my bins so I took it down, as I moved to take a picture he shot that golden silk at me, was awesome, you can see it coming out of him if you zoom in.

The problem with these buggers is they are everywhere and by British standards 'Fooking massive'. Rumour has it they cause more deaths than any other spider because the huuuge webs they weave (can be 2metres across)are generally across footpaths or between trees and posts and people walk thru the web then have heart attacks looking for the great big spider thats somewhere on them. Maybe an Urban Legend, may not but they sure are pretty and freaky looking.

My absence is noted

Hello there my furry friends!

It's been a loooong time since I updated this thing, my excuses are I have been busy and too lazy at the same time, sorry folks but you'll need to take a break reading this one.

So whats been going on in my life? well I went to V fest a couple of weeks ago which was pretty good and had that homely feel of slop and mud to your ankles as it rained all day before the event. I went to see the Rakes(nearly Roisin Murphy, stupid map), who were pretty damn good and jet lagged as they told us. Queens of the Stone Age rocked as ever whilst people flung mud at each other and slid in the fetid watery parts, this only to be topped when the Smashing Pumpkins grabbed the main stage and we had alot of mud wrestling going on, and not the good kind. I think Billy Corgan tried to take advantage of this mentality when he wanted to incite a fight with the other stage (as it was called) when the Presets were pumping their way over the top Bass into the Pumpkins arena, although he claimed no responsibility. What the Pumpkins can claim responsibility for is making me feel 15 years old again playing some of the classics that I grew up with! It was AWESOME and a great end to a good day.

So apart from V fest there hasn't really been much else going on, I'm still restricted to 20 hours of stupid work a week due to the limitations of the student visa, due to this I'm still trying to pay stupid school fees on time. Only stupid because my bank balance looks all nice only for it to be sucked out which means I cant buy Wii games and occasionally beer!!... all for a good cause I suppose.

Work is work, its been fun recently apart form drunken idiots fighting my friend and manager Jeremy, poor old Jez been hit in the head I think twice in as many weekends. The best one was last weekend when we had the Hip Hop tribute on, now most of these guys are cool and respectable but there was a bunch of absolute wannabes and when some guy baited them they went off on a crazy 8mile tryout failures spiel and attempted to 'rap' the guy into submission, this ended in a glass to the face and Jez and I trying to pull apart idiots who cant have a bit of fun and have to take offense at everything cos they can handle like five drinx maaan!!! kids!

So the best part of this is when we throw the 'Wind up guy' out only to have the G's jump the beer garden fence and attack the bloke five to one. We broke that up and everything was going fine until Leader of the 8mile rejects has a pop at me giving me all the jibe about running me down and as he actually said it 'pop you' whilst making a gun motion and walking towards me aggressively, I stood my ground and simply said in my dry sarcastic way that those who know me love (or hate) Dude, you're so black and Gangsta right now, you feel like a real maaaaan?? at which point I think I was about to be headbutted by this toothless bogan when Jez saved the day and pushed him away and the police finally turned up, which brings me to my next point......

....Brisbane Emergency Services! I've encountered them 3 times now and they are utter shite, a disgrace! I'd get faster medical or police attention in New Orleans and the only reason I can say straight up is because 2 Ambulance headquarters and 3 local police stations are all within 2minutes of my work which is what the next scribblings are about.

Encounter 1, Old guy falls down steps, smashes his head into the concrete and is unconscious and bleeding, I ring 000 and get an answer, it takes the woman 7 minutes to get thru to the Ambulance dept, the woman then takes another minutes trying to get more info than I know as I am on the work phone around 2 corners and 100m away which she doesnt seem to get and then finally the Ambluance comes a total of 50 minutes later....Disgraceful really.

Encounter 2, Fight ensues between a drunken punter whom we cut off and Jez as he takes a beer off him which he procured by deceitful means, he then decides to provoke Jeremy and a small scuffle ensues which I help to break up and then call police and securtiy! Get thru to police as Jez comes downstairs and is jumped not only by the guy but 3 or 4 of his mates and has blood all over his face, takes me 4 minutes to get thru... fight getting out of control.. Police or on there way..cool I relax... fight spills onto street and up the road....10 minutes have passed... random chick tries to intervene like and idiot and gets thrown to the floor for grabbing fighting men from behind and hurts herself.... Im trying to call police again and restrain folks with security and a rather wild blood strewn Jez, instigators run off and fight calms down 40 minutes have passed I go in clean up with Paul and sign off and after 1 hour and 10 mins no police came.

Encounter 3, the story of hip hop battlas above, the police took over half an hour to come then too.

And thats that, I'll try update more often! peace and love to all!

Lee